Marlon Familton, MA LMHC
1601 116th Ave NE, Ste. 102
Bellevue, WA  98004
425-417-4700

Meditation - Step 2

 

Meditation is an important tool used to become more self-aware and gain control over your brain.  Our brain is the organ in Our body that processes everything. Unfortunately it sometimes spits out negative thoughts or beliefs that sabotage our efforts to be better.  No matter what issues you struggle with in life, increasing your self-awareness and control of your own brain will help tremendously - it can be done.  The skill of meditation is really mental rehearsal. 

Mental rehearsal is a way of focusing your mind on what it important to you and tuning into your own inner intuition and inspiration and experiencing who you want to be to begin creating the wires in your brain to be different.  To be able to hear the new thoughts, you have to quiet your mind and tune out all the interfering ones. This is how to get started with mental rehearsal and changing your thinking. We will start by using two words that will become powerful energizers for changing who you are and how you react.

First, identify a problem issue that has to do with how you think or react to situations or others.  As you think about this, Watch a YouTube clip of Dr. Joe Dispenza from the movie "What the Bleep Do We Know?" where he talks about emotional addiction. 

Reflect on how you may be addicted to certain thoughts or emotions.  This also applies to habitual ways of thinking as well as reactions to emotions.  Think about how you typically react to your emotions and how those reactions may cause problems in your life. Are you critical? Judgmental (do you think and use the word "should" often?)  Are you defensive? Do you yell?  Use name-calling? Jab at those around you or even yourself?

Maybe you procrastinate?  Maybe you do not finish what you start?  Whatever aspect of yourself that you want to improve, if you can identify it, you can transform it.  What negative thought does your brain spout off, what judgment of yourself or others does it generate all the time?  It is these negative associations to thoughts, feelings and reactions that we seek to change in this work, so you can become more self-aware and effectively respond versus react and self-defeating ways.  The more self aware you are, the more you will recognize these thoughts and feelings and be able to chose to respond (or not) from a place of intention, not reaction.

Two Word Meditation
Here is a great tool for helping you begin to change how you respond to situations.  Based on what you determined is a problem that you want to change, what would you like to feel, express or how would you want to react instead. Calm?  Patient? Kind?  What do you want your inner feeling and/or outer reflection that others see, to be?

Let's say that when someone does something irritating to you, you think to yourself, That's stupid, they shouldn't do it that way. Next you become grumpy and say something critical.  Needless to say, this probably is not enhancing your relationships or leaving you feeling happy.  When you start to think, they are always irritating me. Guess what? You will get more of them irritating you! Your brain is designed to tune into what you are focusing on, negative or positive.

Instead if you want to feel calm, be more flexible, less irritated and express patience or kindness to others (so you get more of that back), you will have to become that.  No one makes us think or feel anything; we do that to ourselves.  If you want your inner feeling and/or the outer expression to be calm, patient, peaceful, kind, etc., ask yourself what energy would you need to draw in to create that?

My own energy word is tolerance and my desire is to express kindness, even when I am feeling upset, irritated or annoyed.  In order for me to get to kindness when I am feeling those emotions, I need to draw in the energy of tolerance.  To remember this when upset, I have to first create this pathway and association in my brain.  The more and more I use it, the quicker it will come to mind when I am upset.  Then I can use it to interrupt the old association and reaction in my mind and build a new more intentional (and effective) one.

Exercise: Use the power of mediation with your two words

Every morning to start your meditation routine (which we are now building for you), listen to the meditation mp3, and start to clear your mind of thoughts and focus on your two words. As you inhale, say the first word inside your mind and imagine drawing in the energy of that first word. Energy is neither created nor destroyed it merely transforms. So next, imagine the energy of your first word transforming into the second word in your body, while you say that word in your head and exhale.  Inhaling and exhaling calmly turn on your parasympathetic nervous system, the "rest and digest" system which will help you feel more calm and gain more from the mental rehearsal to follow.

What two words will empower you?  Patience and kindness?  Calmness and gentleness?  Perhaps you want to focus on healing?  How about drawing in "healing" energy and manifesting "health".  Choose a word that fuels you up and another that manifests whatever good feelings you want.

The goal and the result you will experience if you stick with this is increased self-awareness of what your body is feeling and what emotions are inside.  You will also strengthen your ability to notice a negative emotion (or fear or doubt about an outcome you seek) and use them as a cue to switch to your two words, the second of which to become how you respond (so you no longer react). For me, when I feel irritated or grumpy, I notice those feelings in my body and can now quickly switch to feeling grateful. That changes how I react to the situation or person I am facing leading to a more mindful reaction.

When you have chosen your two words and performed this meditation for at least a few days Email me and let me know what words you use and what your experience has been with this exercise.

Intro page

Step 1 - EFT Tapping

Step 3 - Gratitude

Step 4 - Affirmations

Step 5 - Visualizations

Step 6 - Putting it all together